What's Next?

 The past couple of months have been a whirlwind as I got ready for and had my first solo show. While it was a pretty exhausting, the entire experience from start to finish was absolutely perfect and I am immensely grateful. So many friends came to the opening, the show looked fabulous in the gallery, I met many new people, sold several paintings, and even had my picture in the paper! I am an optimist by nature but even I wasn't expecting that much good stuff.

An A-Mazing Maze

The dust has settled and I am now pondering my next move. I've loved working on the Neighborhood Series but I saw the show as a culmination of that work and I'm ready to move on to new things. It's an exciting place to be and there are so many possibilities. I even have an inkling of an idea and direction...

I was fortunate this weekend to hear a talk by one of my favorite Houston artists who does amazing graphite drawings that involve family narratives. He said that when he started art school, he tried to do abstract expressionist work but it didn't feel right. Then he started mining his personal history and everything fell into place. I could very much relate. The major revelation I had in doing my show is that my work is rooted in my family and childhood experiences. Since I don't paint figures, it's not easy for others to understand this or for me to translate it, especially when I paint buildings and electric substations. Since my inkling of an idea and direction involves buildings once again, my challenge will be to continue to make my paintings feel human without including any signs of life in them. Should be interesting.

To gain some inspiration, I am taking a trip to the Big Apple to see American Modern at the Museum of Modern Art and every other museum and gallery that I can squeeze into two days. I've got my walking shoes and sketchbook ready!

Art, Could You Please Make Yourself?

Part of Giant Untitled Painting, 2013

I haven't been writing in this blog because I have been working nonstop to get ready for my very first solo show that opens August 23rd at Lawndale. I just finished a 4.5' x 15' painting, that is a diptych, i.e. a painting in two parts. I feel very relieved to have that monster done!

Getting ready for an exhibition has a way of taking over your life. You spend many of your waking hours looking at the calendar to see how much time you have left to finish everything and then as you try to fall asleep you worry about all the stuff you still have to do, remember that you should be writing about it in this blog, and then thinking about what you'll work on the next day. When you get to the studio and have been there for what you think is an hour, days and years have actually passed. I'm slightly exaggerating on that last one but I am amazed at how quickly time passes when I'm in the studio and how it seems to stand still when I'm at my day job! (No offense day job, I love and need you.)

When I am not painting, worrying, at the day job, or trying to fall asleep, my husband and I watch a lot of those "survival" type shows on TV. Seeing people who are dropped into the middle of nowhere without food or clothing makes me feel a little less whiny about having to spend all my free time painting. It also gives me great ideas for television programming. My idea is to have a reality show about an artist dropped into the middle of the Amazon jungle by themself, who must make fire, gather food, build a shelter, find water, AND prepare for a solo art show. That would be awesome.

Art and the Introvert

The Window at Big Bend National Park

I am both shy and introverted (apparently they can be mutually exclusive) so giving presentations has never been something I look forward to. I have overcome many fears in my 48 years but this one still nags at me. What is baffling is that I've never had a bad public speaking experience that I can recall--no one has ever heckled me or threw stuff at me. I've even gotten positive comments on occasion. After countless presentations I haven't died, so why does this still bother me so much?

Although I have heard that most people fear public speaking more than death, I don't like to admit that I have this fear because I'm afraid it will just perpetuate and make the situation worse. So why am I admitting it then? I know that I am not the only scaredy cat out there, and dammit, everyone deserves to be heard, even if they are shy!

Last week, I did a "Pecha Kucha" presentation on my art at DiverseWorks. It was a five minute slide show and talk, which is not very daunting, but still I was a little nervous and wanted to enjoy doing it rather than just doing it to get it over with. To get ready, I did something called "tapping" which essentially involves stimulating the body's energy meridians to relieve anxiety and other icky stuff. You can find out about it here. I know, it sounds all New-Agey and such, but I will take the risk of sounding like a flake if it will help others get over this fear. And it's much better than that age old suggestion of picturing your audience naked. Who thought of that one and how is that supposed to relax you?!?!

I am happy to report that my presentation went fine; I felt calm, I remembered most of what I wanted to say, and I didn't die. I call that a success!

What Success Means to Me

"How did it go?" or "how was it?" are a questions I often hear from neighboring artists after a big open studio event. The real question being asked is "did you sell anything?" but this question is rarely asked directly. Many of my non-artist friends though, who I am sure only have my best interests at heart and don't know how hard it is to sell big paintings, cut to the chase with: "did you sell anything?" When I explain that no I didn't sell anything but yes the event went great, I feel like they don't really understand how something that did not result in sales could be "great."

Two Fridays ago, we had our big Spring open studio event at Winter Street Studios. We had a lot of traffic and many visitors. I met lots of new people, caught up with friends and returning visitors, and had meaningful conversations about my art with several people. The event introduced my work to many new viewers who will come to my shows and, who knows, may eventually buy a painting or two. I was thrilled to sell two small paintings, but the event would also have been a success if I had not.

Sure, I need to make money from my artwork. This is not a hobby for me, it is my career. It is also something I would do whether I needed to support myself doing something non-art related for the rest of my life (although I hope that is not the case). I have tried hard to do other things than be an artist but this is all I really want to do and it is something I cannot not do.

Every day I get to make art is a successful day for me. Every time I get to show my art is a successful day. Every time someone enjoys or "gets" my art is a successful day. Every day that I do not give up on doing what I love and was put on earth to do is a successful day.

What We Do Is Secret

I am gearing up for the big ART. - A Spring Artist Exhibition coming up this Friday night at Winter Street and Spring Street Studios where we will open our studios so people can check us out in our natural habitat. I will have a preview of some of my new stuff including Cover Me, which is not nearly as washed out as this picture would have you believe. I have a bit of a like/not like relationship with open studio events. I enjoy meeting people, explaining the intent behind my work, my process, how I get my lines so straight, etc. I also enjoy hearing impressions of what my paintings remind them of and, of course, love the exposure and sales that result from a open studio event.

I am not as inclined though to share the actual physical process of making art.
My workspace is cluttered with reference photos, tracings, color swatches, sketchbooks, notes to myself, and a picture of my mom. The idea of someone looking through my stuff feels like an invasion of privacy. I keep hearing over and over again that people want to see the behind the scenes aspects of how artwork gets made. I certainly understand the curiosity but I think there is some value to keeping things mysterious. If people knew how much boring, repetitive work was involved and what a small role inspiration plays in making art they would be very disappointed! Because of this, I have dual studios, one at home and one at Winter Street.

My studio at Winter Street is like a model showroom, while my tiny home studio, seen here, is the factory where the work gets done. It's noisy (NPR All Songs Considered or Pandora), messy (piles of paper, palettes of wet paint, canvases and cat hair), and my secret refuge. Only me, the cats, and with express written permission, my husband, are allowed in there. At Winter Street everything is tidy and organized, and a welcoming sign says "C'mon In!" If you're in the area, do come in. I promise you, fantasy is much better than reality.

Big Spring Exhibition and Charity Box Show

You will be happy to know that I have been working diligently on my paintings these past few weeks. The stuff of life has thrown me off course here and there but I finished the painting to the right this past week. It is for the Winter Street Studios Big Spring Exhibition and Charity Box Show, April 12th from 6-10 p.m. More than 250 12"x12" works will be available for $100 each, with proceeds benefiting Freedom Place.

Come see me and my studio mate Marsha Glickman in studio #A8. We will have lots art for your viewing enjoyment!

Large and In Charge

While trying to come up with a title for this post, I realized how many sayings there are related to "bigness" including: go big or go home, Mr. Big Stuff, big man on campus, be the bigger person, and my favorite, "No man stands taller than when he reaches down to pet a cat," an awesome quote from my husband that nobody better steal!

I went from doing a very small painting last time to a much larger painting this time around. I had a flash of inspiration and a deadline to meet, which turned out to be the perfect combination. The painting is titled, Privacy Please, and is 48"H x 36"W. I liked working on something that is almost as tall as I am although I had to remember to mix three times as much paint as I thought I needed. Lots of area to cover on this one! I have entered it and two new paintings in the Visual Arts Alliance's Open Exhibition so keep your fingers crossed for me.

Can't I Just Stay Home With My Cats?

I finished painting number three last night. It's a smaller and narrower format than I usually work in but I'm happy with the result. I'm obsessed with tree shadows right now and whenever there is a sunny day, I am out taking lots of reference photos. Many of the trees are still leaf-less and cast the most amazing, limb-like shadows on buildings. Now I have the task of trying to figure out what to do for my next painting - so many ideas! I've got my work cut out for me.

I would love nothing more than to stay at home painting with my cat assistants by my side, but as I move further into the world of being an artist who wants people to see, enjoy and purchase my work, I am realizing that being social is pretty important. Like the old adage offered to shy girls and boys hoping to go on a date: Prince/Princess Charming isn't going knock on your door, you need to get out and meet people. While I do like to socialize and meet people, I am an introvert through and through. Where social occasions are energizing for extroverts, they tend to be draining for introverts. Because of this I am highly selective with my gallivanting.

A case in point--there were two opening receptions tonight that I had planned to attend: a printmaker's show at Avis Frank and Beth Secor's show at Inman Gallery. This morning I felt energetic and raring to go to both. As the day went on, I decided to skip the Avis Frank show, and later, after every shred of extroversion had left my body, I decided to stay home. What I like about receptions is that I usually meet new people, see friends, and meet the artists featured in the show. I also think its important to get out and be part of the art community.

The reality is that making art is a very solitary activity. Because of this, it attracts a lot of introverts who enjoy their studio time immensely and cringe when it's time to get out and be social. While I don't exactly "cringe" at socializing, I really do prefer staying home with my cats. Don't take it personally though, it's not you, it's me.

Ordinary Paintings

I visited the Lawndale Art Center this week to scope out the gallery where I will be having my show in August. I'm a planner (I even have a degree in planning. Unused to this day!) and in order to calm my nerves, I tend to analyze, over analyze and plan every minute detail of any project I undertake. My husband says that I would be great at planning military battles, but I'm just not into that. I'm more into planning vacations and such.

What I love most about Lawndale is that I never know what to expect when I visit. Invariably there is a video on nonstop loop that must annoy the bejesus out of the staff. The other art though is probably not what your grandmother would consider art, meaning that it is challenging and rarely involves traditional paintings. This worries me a bit. While I don't consider my paintings traditional, next to most of shows I have seen at Lawndale, my paintings seem pretty "normal." The last thing I want to present is the most boring show in Lawndale history. At the same time, I did propose a show of paintings. I guess my challenge is to remain true to my original intention but push what I am doing a little further. It's really exciting to think about the possibilities!

Doing Lines and Meeting Deadlines

No, I have not turned to 1970-era, disco drugs to get my artwork done. I've just been painting lines, lots of lines, as I put the finishing touches on my latest painting. This is usually a very Zen-like experience for me but yesterday I ran out of the right color of paint with only a few lines left to do so that was kind of a buzz kill. Alas, I am a fighter and you can't keep this girl down. I went right back to my disposable palette pad, mixed some more paint and charged on. Mission accomplished! Now I need to decide if I still want to add the side building that I'd planned on and whether to do a cool blue, light Diebenkornish "sky" or keep it white. I kind of like the starkness of the white. We shall see...

Thursday night was the opening of my first two-person show, Toward Subsistence: Paintings by Rebecca Hamm and Cary Reeder, at the O'Kane Gallery, UH-Downtown, Houston. First off, the exhibition looks great! What a hidden gem the O'Kane is - such a great space. I'm so pleased with how my paintings mesh with Rebecca's oversized, abstract watercolors based on the natural environment. While the O'Kane Gallery is a bit off the beaten path, I hope you will stop by to see the show. It's definitely worth the trip!

When I Grow Up I Want to Be A Big Painting

After finishing my first painting of the year, I admit that I  slacked off slightly over the weekend. No, artists do not get weekends off! I seem to respond well to deadline pressure so I am sure I will get going full steam ahead soon. I have been making sketches for one part of my show that is still in the germination stage and have done a study for my next painting (left). I like this whole doing a study first thing. It is much less daunting to paint and repaint at 8" x 10" than  30" x 40". Last night I got the yellow of the house mixed and some preliminary shadow colors mixed and tested. Alas, after the paint dried my yellow had a greenish tinge. Grrrr, back to mixing and testing...


I've been thinking a lot about where I am going with my paintings. I have been working on my Neighborhood Series since late 2009. The paintings are based on houses in the Heights. I don't paint them because I am in love with the architecture of bungalows or am interested in portraying charming cottages. I paint them because to me they represent mystery, the unknown and loss. When I see a house that intrigues me, I'm curious about the many lives lived in it, the secrets it holds, and losses it has endured. These houses are much more than simply impersonal structures. That is what continues to compel me to paint them. At the same time, I don't want to become so one dimensional that I'm only known as a "house" painter. It's important to evolve as an artist. I guess that when I feel finished with this series, I will know that it is time to move on to something new. Until then, bungalows reign!

Is It Done Yet And Other Questions Painters Ask Themselves

I made my deadline with 11 hours, 45 minutes to spare! My painting, seen here and as yet untitled, is pretty much finished. There are a few things not shown in this photo that I want to fix. I usually end up changing the ground color, then the sky color, then changing the ground color again to look better with the sky color. Honestly I could go back and forth for days changing these colors ever so slightly until I'm finally satisfied. I've learned though to step away and sit with a painting for a while first because in a rush to finish you can really screw things up! Nonstop painting is also very tiring, so making decisions when you are exhausted generally ends up in disaster. I am also trying something new and novel: making small studies of paintings first to work out the colors and composition. Hopefully this will help me figure things out before spending hours mixing and taping and painting and mixing and painting, etc.

I very happy to be fully back in the painting groove. I am not struggling with distractions as much and have to remind myself to take breaks and go to sleep at a decent hour. It's so good to be back!

Is There Such A Thing As Painter's Elbow?

I know that it is probably too early to start whining but owwee, my right arm hurts! I had no idea how out of shape I was painting-wise. I guess it is just like exercise; once you start a new routine you feel pain in muscles you never knew you had. I wonder if I can get workman's comp?

Today, I have continued working on those windows I keep going on about. They are coming out good so far. It looks like I am on track to finish this painting by my first deadline so I will not incur the wrath of my sister! I also got some new brushes today and they are delicious to work with.

Taping Madness

When I first started painting, my goal was to loosen up and break away from my commercial art background that required precision and straight lines. Back then, lines and objects had to be hand-drawn because it was the early 80s before the time of computers and all the cool software and gadgets these kids have today. I started out painting relatively loose but have slowly made my way back to a more graphic, hard-edged style which I have accepted as "me." That's fine, I can't fight destiny. I was, however, not too keen on getting into the whole madness of taping, i.e. using painter's tape to get precise straight lines. This was before I switched from oils, with which you can use a ruler to get straight lines, to acrylics, which unfortunately become a wretched mess when you do the same.

So I have entered the land of taping hell. My easel is covered with little pieces of blue tape, wadded up balls of tape are lying all over the floor near the wastebasket, and I keep forgetting to put the cap on the Xacto knife and have nearly stabbed myself several times. I have a love/hate relationship with taping but when I do the "big reveal" of peeling off the tape, oh what clean lines I have! I know that it is bizarre to get this excited about peeling off tape but I don't get out much these days. Work with me people!

Home Improvement is Not Nearly as Fun as They Make it Seem on Home Depot Commercials

The husband and I finished putting up our picket fence today. You would think that wouldn't be very tiring but you would be wrong. This must be why our professions involve us working indoors, away from heavy objects, dirt and power tools. We are just too delicate for hard labor. Both of us are suffering from backaches and walking around like 90 year olds.

That said, I didn't get much accomplished on my painting today other than attempting to transfer painter's tape that I meticulously laid out on vellum and cut out last night. It did not go well, the whole peeling off and transferring part. Usually I would cuss and throw a fit about it but I'm just too tired to do that  today. Yes, I am that tired! I will have more to say about taping tomorrow - stay tuned.

Windows of Obsession

Yesterday, my beloved and I worked on replacing our picket fence which had become an embarrassment and made us the laughing stock of the block. It was pretty exhausting, but after a nap I was able to get into the studio.  I am a Virgo and for anyone who doesn't believe in astrology that's fine, but when I read the description for Virgos they pretty much have me pegged. The primary characteristics of us Virgos are that we are detail-oriented perfectionists and meticulous to the nth degree. These characteristics are all manifesting themselves in the part of my painting I am working on right now.

I am painting one of the windows of the house and am trying to capture the levels of shadow that I see in my reference photo. It took me several hours to mix the paint to the exact color I wanted (warm gray but not too warm) and then to get the values right for each part of the shadow. I've got that step done. Step two will be painting the window pane. Wait till you see the obsession involved with that!

1% Inspiration, 99% Perspiration

2013 is a very big year for me. I'm going to be in my first two-person show in February at the O'Kane Gallery at the University of Houston-Downtown and am getting ready for my first SOLO SHOW in August at the Lawndale Art Center. Of course I am excited but I am also scared shitless. Not about the February show. I have all the paintings done and ready. It's the August show that is freaking me out. I'm afraid that without the deadlines of classes and the seemingly far off in the future date, I will wake up on installation day and have a bundle of great ideas but no actual paintings.

The purpose of this blog is to keep me on track so I can get those paintings done with minimal coffee, email, Facebook, and cat petting breaks. I have also enlisted my sister Joan Babcock, a fabulous artist (check out her work here: www.joanbabcock.com), to keep me on track as my "accountability buddy." This means I have given her permission to yell at me if I don't send her an email with a copy of my completed works by certain dates.

This may seem like an extreme measure to some but I still cannot believe I am having a SOLO SHOW at Lawndale! I love Lawndale! I want it to be awesome! I don't want to wake up on installation day with no paintings! 

So without further adieu, I will now march myself over to my easel and get to work. This blog will chart my progress at keeping focused and getting shit done!